The Eulogy (Die Rede beim Begräbnis)
by the 9th Earl Spencer at the funeral of his sister,
Princess Diana, in London:
I stand before you today the representative of a family in grief, in
a country in mourning before a world in shock.
We are all united not only in our desire to pay our respects to Diana
but rather in our need to do so.
For such was her extraordinary appeal that the tens of millions of
people taking part in this service all over the world via
television and radio who never actually met her, feel that they, too,
lost someone close to them in the early hours of Sunday
morning. It is a more remarkable tribute to Diana than I can ever hope
to offer her today.
Diana was the very essence of compassion, of duty, of style, of beauty.
All over the world she was a symbol of selfless
humanity, a standard-bearer for the rights of the truly downtrodden,
a truly British girl who transcended nationality, someone
with a natural nobility who was classless, who proved in the last year
that she needed no royal title to continue to generate
her particular brand of magic.
Today is our chance to say "thank you" for the way you brightened our
lives, even though God granted you but half a life. We
will all feel cheated that you were taken from us so young and yet
we must learn to be grateful that you came along at all.
Only now you are gone do we truly appreciate what we are now without
and we want you to know that life without you is
very, very difficult.
We have all despaired at our loss over the past week and only the strength
of the message you gave us through your years of
giving has afforded us the strength to move forward.
There is a temptation to rush to canonize your memory. There is no
need to do so. You stand tall enough as a human being of
unique qualities not to need to be seen as a saint. Indeed to sanctify
your memory would be to miss out on the very core of
your being, your wonderfully mischievous sense of humor with the laugh
that bent you double, your joy for life transmitted
wherever you took your smile, and the sparkle in those unforgettable
eyes, your boundless energy which you could barely
contain.
But your greatest gift was your intuition, and it was a gift you used
wisely. This is what underpinned all your wonderful
attributes. And if we look to analyze what it was about you that had
such a wide appeal, we find it in your instinctive feel for
what was really important in all our lives.
Without your God-given sensitivity, we would be immersed in greater
ignorance at the anguish of AIDS and HIV sufferers,
the plight of the homeless, the isolation of lepers, the random destruction
of land mines. Diana explained to me once that it
was her innermost feelings of suffering that made it possible for her
to connect with her constituency of the rejected.
And here we come to another truth about her. For all the status, the
glamour, the applause, Diana remained throughout a very
insecure person at heart, almost childlike in her desire to do good
for others so she could release herself from deep feelings
of unworthiness of which her eating disorders were merely a symptom
The world sensed this part of her character and cherished her for her
vulnerability, whilst admiring her for her honesty. The
last time I saw Diana was on July the first, her birthday, in London,
when typically she was not taking time to celebrate her
special day with friends but was guest of honor at a charity fund-raising
evening.
She sparkled of course, but I would rather cherish the days I spent
with her in March when she came to visit me and my
children in our home in South Africa. I am proud of the fact that apart
from when she was on public display meeting
President Mandela, we managed to contrive to stop the ever-present
paparazzi from getting a single picture of her.
That meant a lot to her.
These are days I will always treasure. It was as if we'd been transported
back to our childhood, when we spent such an
enormous amount of time together, the two youngest in the family.
Fundamentally she hadn't changed at all from the big sister who mothered
me as a baby, fought with me at school and
endured those long train journeys between our parents' homes with me
at weekends. It is a tribute to her level-headedness
and strength that despite the most bizarre life imaginable after her
childhood, she remained intact, true to herself.
There is no doubt that she was looking for a new direction in her life
at this time. She talked endlessly of getting away from
England, mainly because of the treatment she received at the hands
of the newspapers.
I don't think she ever understood why her genuinely good intentions
were sneered at by the media, why there appeared to be
a permanent quest on their behalf to bring her down. It is baffling.
My own, and only, explanation is that genuine goodness
is threatening to those at the opposite end of the moral spectrum
It is a point to remember that of all the
ironies about Diana, perhaps the greatest is this; that a girl given the
name
of the ancient
goddess of hunting was, in the end, the most hunted person of the modern
age.
She would want us today to pledge ourselves to protecting her beloved
boys William and Harry from a similar fate. And I
do this here, Diana, on your behalf. We will not allow them to suffer
the anguish that used regularly to drive you to tearful
despair.
Beyond that, on behalf of your mother and sisters, I pledge that we,
your blood family, will do all we can to continue the
imaginative and loving way in which you were steering these two exceptional
young men, so that their souls are not simply
immersed by duty and tradition but can sing openly as you planned.
We fully respect the heritage into which they have both been born,
and will always respect and encourage them in their royal
role. But we, like you, recognize the need for them to experience as
many different aspects of life as possible, to arm them
spiritually and emotionally for the years ahead. I know you would have
expected nothing less from us.
William and Harry, we all care desperately for you today. We are all
chewed up with sadness at the loss of a woman who
wasn't even our mother. How great your suffering is we cannot even
imagine.
I would like to end by thanking God for the small mercies he has shown
us at this dreadful time; for taking Diana at her most
beautiful and radiant and when she had so much joy in her private life.
Above all, we give thanks for the life of a woman I am so proud to
be able to call my sister: the unique the complex, the
extraordinary and irreplaceable Diana, whose beauty, both internal
and external, will never be extinguished from our minds.